Shop — Crackodile & Friends

✉ Mail Order Only

Bundle

Crackids Fan Club Membership

Look, I'm not supposed to be recruiting people. The Network has very specific feelings about that. But you found this page, and that tells me something. Send a check or money order. Wally handles the rest personally. Don't ask what that means.

Signed letter from Wally · Embossed membership certificate · Membership card · 3 stickers (1 exclusive member-only design) · Coloring page · Password to the Crackids Bunker · Crackids Don't Give In (1992) + Stranger Danger! (1993) — interactive CD-ROM adventures · Permanent 10% off for life

🔒 Members Only

Fan Club exclusive shirt — Bella Canvas 3001C, $23.99. Only available to verified members. Not sold here.

Stickers

Smokers Lounge Sticker

For surfaces that need a warning label and haven't gotten one yet. Weatherproof, laminated, made at Butler Street Studios in Easton, PA. Approx. 3.75".

Stickers

Become a Crackid Sticker

Wally wants you to have this. He was very insistent about it. Weatherproof, laminated, made at Butler Street Studios in Easton, PA. Approx. 3.5".

Stickers

Crackodile & Friends Logo Sticker

The original. Put it somewhere it belongs or doesn't. We don't judge. Weatherproof, laminated, made at Butler Street Studios in Easton, PA. Approx. 5".

Crackodile & Friends OG ’92 Button 3-Pack

Limited — 59 Units

Accessories

OG ’92 Button 3-Pack ★ MISPRINT

Original 1992* button set. Three designs on plain-paper printed faces with plastic pinbacks, bagged and headered exactly as they left the studio. Here’s the thing: the header card reads Crackhead. Not Crackid. Crackhead. We found one box. There were 59. These are all of them. Each one is hand-numbered on the back.

A modern version with metal backs, photo-paper faces, and a corrected header is coming. This is not that. This is the one someone should have caught in 1992.

Accessories

Button — Modern Edition (Single)

Same three designs as the ’92 set, done right. Photo-paper printed faces, metal pinbacks, header corrected to read Crackid. Pick one. Mix and match. No choking hazard lecture on this one — you're on your own.

Crackodile & Friends Button 3-Pack Modern

Accessories

Button 3-Pack — Modern Edition

All three designs. Photo-paper faces, metal backs, bagged and headered. Unlimited run. No misprint. If you want the misprint you're already too late — those are above and almost gone.

Apparel

Become a Crackid Tee

Welcome to the family. You didn't choose to become a Crackid — it just kind of sneaks up on you. This shirt at least gives people a heads up you're coming.

Print

Winners Don’t Lose Drugs Coloring Book

24 pages, saddle-stitched. For adults who need to keep their hands busy while their life choices catch up to them. Stay inside the lines — or don't. Wally isn't your dad. He doesn't care.

Accessories

Crackodile & Friends Tote Bag

Large enough for groceries. Sturdy enough for evidence. Do not ask Wally what he keeps in his.

Apparel

Crackodile & Friends Hoodie

The official uniform of questionable decisions. Heavyweight fleece designed to keep the existential dread out. It kind of works.

Apparel

Crackodile & Friends Polo

Looks professional while maintaining your absolute lack of integrity. Moisture-wicking technology helps hide the cold sweats during interrogations or legal depositions. The logo says “I hit more than the links.” Wear it to a meeting. Do not explain it.

Accessories

Crackodile & Friends Beanie

Warm enough for bad decisions in cold weather. Wally endorses this hat specifically, which should tell you something.

We’re All Out Folks Button

Powder Panic Button

Crackodile & Friends Logo Button

Squirrelly's
Stupors

ACTIVITY BOOK

Coming Soon!

Print

Squirrelly's Stupors Activity Book

For people who relate to Squirrelly more than they would like to admit. He's been working on it. Coming soon.